Creativity
This is the definition of creative.
Hire that guy to look at the budget.
Apparently I can update the blog through the Drivel, a Linux livejournal/wordpress/etc updating program. This is the second best solution for me because the WP interface lags like a dog on my computer for whatever reason.
So if this works…
I told some friends this over the last few weeks, but this is my great, genius, evil idea:
Remember those Magic Eye things, where you stare at them and see a picture? I loved those stupid things when I was a kid. One day, I had an idea, though:
A Magic Eye, but when you look at it? It’s goatse. If you know what goatse is, take a minute to think about how funny that would be. If you don’t, don’t ever look it up and avoid links with those letters in the name. It’s just an awful picture from a shock site. And it will never leave your brain once you see it.
Bendy and I went over our budget again yesterday because her car is acting up and I’ve had about enough of it; I want to get her something new, even though her current car is a 2005 Ford Escape with under 60,000 miles. Nobody can figure out what’s causing it to randomly start sputtering and die when it comes to a stop, not even two different Ford dealerships. This just tells me “don’t buy Ford.” But that’s another post.
Our budget lists a worst case scenario for a lot of monthly expenses. For example, the most we’ve spent buying groceries in a given week is assumed to be what we’ll spend every week. Things are rounded up to the nearest five bucks; ten if it’s a big bill. Looking at it, I think we could take the hit of a car payment for a used car. But one thing that sucks a whole lot?
We’re losing around a third of our income to taxes and social security. A bit more if her state-employee-mandatory-retirement is counted. I consider all of these to be taxes since the programs will all be bankrupt by the time we get to retirement age. We’re not getting that money back; it is thus a tax. (We need a constitutional amendment that states “if you take money from the government, you’re not allowed to vote.” No more people voting themselves more free shit at our expense.)
We don’t make enough money that in any sane world we should be losing this much of our income. If our taxes were half of what they were we could be completely out of debt (cars, mortgage, student loans) within a few years. Pick off one form of debt, focus all payments on another — bam, avalanche effect. But no, the oversized government is getting its grubby hands on our money first. If the Obamatons get their way and healthcare benefits become taxable income, that’ll pretty much break our budget and we’ll have to ditch health insurance.
I work hard, she works hard. I went through college without a whole lot of anything — including driving a 1992 Dodge Dakota (which still runs, thanks Ford) and not having a cell phone until I switched from a two-year to a four-year college that required me to drive an hour one way — and so did she. We worked, took out student loans (which we’re paying back). I drive an hour one-way to work (which is why we bought a Civic). We’re careful with our money, but it’s ridiculous that so much of it is taken before we get it.
I don’t have any problem with tax money that goes to roads, or schools (under some circumstances; I think the system is broken). I don’t have trouble with tax money going to the department of defense, or NASA, or any sort of space exploration or scientific endeavor. But I think we need some reforms in our system that involve people paying for their own shit.
If Bendy had bought this house a year earlier and gotten behind on the payments, maybe someone else would be paying them for us. Then it’d be party time; after taxes the mortgage is our biggest expense. But it should be, because our house is one of our most important expenses.
I know I’m screaming into the storm here, and hardly anyone reads this blog (part of why I ripped the comment code from wordpress? more spam comments than real comments; that, and I don’t feel like moderating them. this is my soapbox anyway), but it pisses me off. So I’ll vent. It’s not like we have a choice in the matter anyway; we’re going to be taxed and people are going to continue to vote themselves part of our paycheck.
As income taxes increase, watch charitable contributions decrease. People in this nation will gladly give others that need it their money, but only when they have it to give.
Wow.
With all the grade inflation going on, a 2.7 average GPA doesn’t mean shit. Twenty years ago it would probably be a solid 0.7. Welcome to the real world you ‘tard. I wouldn’t hire you to clean my car.
There’s this place, called Assholeville, and I’d like to tell you about a few of it’s features.
One, it’s hard to shop in Assholeville, because the residents block aisles with their carts and talk to people. You see, the entire world revolves around each resident of Assholeville. If you try to get around them, you are rude for interrupting their important conversation.
Also, it is impossible to get a speeding ticket in Assholeville. This is because the assholes all drive in the left hand lane, under the speed limit. You see, that’s not the fast lane. It’s the Asshole Lane.
Assholes also don’t understand space between their front bumper and your rear bumper. They believe that space is a violation of the Charter of Assholeville. Specifically the part where your life is important. They don’t understand three- or four-way stop signs, either. Typically, Assholes believe they go first, regardless of the actual laws regarding assholes.
Another fact about Assholeville you may want to know — it doesn’t have an actual physical location. Anywhere with two or more assholes gathered in a ten mile radius, or one of the elite class of assholes, is technically Assholeville.
I promise, I won’t use that title again until Ron Jeremy dies. But the Vietnamese dong is down. I wouldn’t usually care, but c’mon, this quote is priceless:
The dong swiftly plunged to the bottom [...]
O mai.
It also includes such gems as ” send the dong far lower over coming” and “collapse in the dong”.
I’ve been trying to get into WImbledon after a long break from tennis, and today just might have done it.
Ana Ivanovic, the number one seed, lost to Jie Zheng… the number 133 in the world. 6-1, 6-4!
I saw that and I immediately thought…well, the title says it all. I wish I’d seen that match because, just… damn. What the hell happened there?
I just did a seven-plus-thousand word marathon of writing fiction.
My hands are exhausted, because I did a lot of typing other than that tonight, too. Yeah, it’s 5:20 and I’m still awake. That’s what happens when all the sudden my muse is like, “come play with us, Danny.”
then I pimp slap my muse and say “My name aint Danny bitch” and we get to work.
No, really, I’m kind of delirious. I haven’t written this much fiction at a time since July and it’s a pretty great feeling and I’m not ready to stop but my hands are about to file for a divorce. So I think I’m going to break out the voice recorder and dictate the next chapter.
The real bitch of it is, in 30 hours I have a class.