August 25, 2009

Blowhards

Filed under: Peeves — Adam @ 6:34 pm

Drudge has his list of the top rated cable news guys, and the highest rated MSNBC guy is Keith Olbermann. Which, just, wow. That says a lot about the average intelligence of an MSNBC viewer. Olbermann is perhaps the only person in the world that is a bigger douche than Bill O’Reilly. That takes skill and determination.

The top three for Fox are all self-righteous turds.

I don’t know why the big media “conservatives” that are basically cashing in on Rush Limbaugh’s success are such blowhards, but seriously —

Bill O’Reilly is the most obnoxious, self-righteous shit EXCEPT Keith Olbermann. His faux moral crusader bullshit got old in 2003 and his continued popularity makes me fear for the future of any real conservative movement. Which, if the moralistic shit he preaches is going to be the type of movement we get then it may be a good thing.

I’ve heard Sean Hannity described as a human talking point. I can’t remember where I heard it, but it’s the truest statement in the history of mankind. His attempt to make himself into the flag with that “great American” stuff is the most ridiculous thing I’ve heard on the radio. If he had half the talent that Limbaugh had, he might be tolerable, but he’s closer to Franken on the talent scale.

Then there’s Glenn Beck, who was kind of interesting for about ten minutes. But seriously, the man is repetitive and limited to the extent of being pathetic. If I have to hear him read that ad about “value and values” one more time I may lose my mind, which is part of why I don’t listen to him anymore. The other part? He’s the biggest self-induced martyr I’ve ever heard on the right. If he thought it would get him ratings I have no doubt he would literally nail himself to a cross and blame it on Nancy Pelosi. That, and every single thing that happens he claims he predicted a year or two ago. Seriously man, get a new schtick.

The one not on Fox News but the radio that is just batshit insane is Michael Savage. Seriously, how that man has avoided a stroke should be a matter of great medical research. He’s always getting pissed off and screaming and accusing people of being homosexuals — which is kind of weird since he’s so far in the closet that another step will take him to Narnia. Every time I turn on his station for the local traffic on the way home from work I hear him talking about some guy’s physique, how good looking some guy is, his little toy poodle or whatever it is, or worse, about his great scarf. All he needs is a lisp and a show on HGTV to complete the picture.

Update, some months later: I am surprised I didn’t mention Schnitt. Wow. That guy is annoying, and he’s always on about how “HAT!” some woman or another is. Smooth move, hairplugs.

One down.

Filed under: Imbeciles and Kooks — Adam @ 6:10 pm

Good. Too bad there is no Earthly punishment possible for such a gruesome, soulless son of a bitch. There is no legal recourse that would inflict upon him the pain he did his victims and their families, for no reason.

There is no excuse for the actions of those involved. None. There is no justification. I hope the people of the jury sentence the man to death so he can continue on to his eternal punishment as soon as possible.

August 20, 2009

The Height of Hypocrisy.

Filed under: Peeves, Politics — Adam @ 6:25 pm

In 2004, when Massachusetts Senator John Kerry was running for President, Democrats (optimistically) passed a law in the state to prevent then Governor Romney from replacing the Senator, for fear he would pick a Republican. Now, four years later, Senator Ted Kennedy is facing his own mortality (40 years too late to be justice). The Democrats are talking about changing the law to allow the current governor to replace him, as opposed to forcing them to wait on the special election.

This is the height of hypocrisy. One set of laws for Republicans, one set for Democrats. This is the type of politics that makes me not want to be involved in the process — it’s dirty, it’s low down, and it’s exploiting the system. That is not how it was meant to be.

Of course, had we not passed the populist nonsense that allows Senators to be elected directly, we wouldn’t have this problem. I’m all for returning to the time when Senators were chosen by the state legislature and chosen to represent the states.

August 17, 2009

GI Joe

Filed under: Entertainment — Adam @ 2:47 pm

Bendy and I decided at dinner yesterday that we should see G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra. Now, oddly enough, this was more her idea than mine — she wanted to see the movie, but insisted she could wait for the DVD. I, on the other hand, was hesitant about even that. We got there, got good seats, and enjoyed the most annoying-asshole free movie I’ve seen in a while.

To sum up, it wasn’t as bad as you’d think. It was actually a pretty good movie for a G.I. Joe movies. They were, after all, toys designed to be sold to eight year old boys. I used to have more than could possibly be healthy. The plot was about as good as any summer action boom-fest movie could be. There were parts that annoyed me, and the acting was horrible. Overall, however, I think it was a good movie given what it was. But that falls in with my “take it for what it’s meant to be” sort of attitude about movies now — everything can’t be The Usual Suspects.

Joseph Gordon-Levitt was actually really, really good as Cobra Commander, and the entire story behind him was pretty decent. But that guy has proved a few times to have some pretty good acting skills. Also, Christopher Eccleston was fantastic as Destro. This guy is awesome, though. Also, Arnold Vosloo nailed his part. So those were three really awesome actors and parts, with pretty good subplots.

Oh, and the two ninjas, Snake Eyes and Storm Shadow, were well done (again, for what they were) and the story there was pretty good if kind of standardized.

Now that I’ve been nice, I really want to gripe about a few specific issues. Possible spoilers below, but not about anything good and all of it was predictable from the first fifteen minutes:

Firstly, Scarlett. Now, I don’t remember the cartoon, so maybe this was accurate to her character. But really, seriously, Hollywood: Women can be bad ass without being stereotypical “all men and love are crap” man-hating bitches that fall for the witty hero in the end. Seriously. That was obnoxious as all hell. They had a perfectly good female character — physically strong, attractive, intelligent, and they ruined her by making her bog-standard with stupid emotional retardation that gave nothing to the story other than keeping Stupid Romantic Subplot Number One going.

Secondly, Stupid Romantic Subplots. I take great care in my romantic subplots in my writing, and I’m critical as hell of my own stuff, but seriously, there are porno movies with better romantic sub plots than action movies. Hell, the T-Mobile commercial where the ten year old tries to seduce Catherine Zeta Jones is a better romantic subplot than the interaction between Ripcord and Scarlett and Duke and Baroness.

Thirdly, Ripcord and Marlon Wayans. Okay, what, Will Smith wasn’t available to play the (all together now) bog standard bad-ass black guy with attitude? I get that they’re trying to portray a black man in a positive light, but he was really just obnoxious and playing the stereotype so hard I half expected to find out it was really some white guy with blackface on.

Fourthly, Channing Tatum is possibly the most annoying looking person I’ve ever seen. All through the movie something about him bothered me, until it hit me — he looks like a retarded relative of Ryan Reynolds. That, and my God, maybe it was just the movie, but he couldn’t act his way out of a bike helmet.

Finally, and maybe I just expect too much, but good Lord Sienna Miller can’t act. I don’t know why they chose her for Baroness, she’s not really that attractive even by Hollywood’s fucked up standards, but she seemed to be competing with Megan Fox in some sort of contest to be the most aggravating person with black hair in a summer blockbuster. The only thing she has over Fox really is that she doesn’t look like a male prostitute from Thailand. Tie their ankles together and use them as shit-acting nunchuks.

Oh, wait, no, Really Finally, was Dennis Quaid boozing between takes or what?

August 3, 2009

Welcome to the real world, bitch.

Filed under: whiskeytangofoxtrot — Adam @ 7:01 pm

Wow.

Just wow.

With all the grade inflation going on, a 2.7 average GPA doesn’t mean shit. Twenty years ago it would probably be a solid 0.7. Welcome to the real world you ‘tard. I wouldn’t hire you to clean my car.